Author Archives: Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

About Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

Bouncing into middle age armed with courage, ambition and a pair of tweezers (chin hairs for anyone over the age of 45 reading this) I am a writer with a mission: to redefine this midway point in my life when the last thing I want to do is hang up my high heels and become invisible. This is the end of the beginning, not the beginning of the end. A single mum to 3 fabulous girls, an author, and a fundraising consultant, both ends of my candle are on fire. As I enter this new stage of my life, I want to explore what it means for 'mid-aged' women today, who were promised they could have it all, ended up doing it all, and just do not identify with the traditional image of middle age.

Lasting Firsts

Posted on February 22, 2011 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

Like everything in my life at the moment, two ends of the spectrum run in parallel – sometimes so close, the lines lie against each other, indeterminate, entwined, indistinguishable. My mum needs caring in the same way as my baby. … Continue reading →

Posted in feeding, mum, stroke | 5 Comments

Grown up love

Posted on February 17, 2011 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

I’m so proud of them. No, I’m not talking about our girls – although they make me so proud there isn’t a blog host or an internet range large enough to hold the stuff I could write about them. No, … Continue reading →

Posted in family, mum, stroke | 6 Comments

It’s so sad, I’m laughing

Posted on February 9, 2011 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

Just when I thought life couldn’t get any harder? It got harder. I feel like I’m on one of those fairground rides – and like most fairground rides, I just want to get off. The one where you walk along … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 7 Comments

Who’s the Mummy?

Posted on January 30, 2011 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

I’ve written before about that fuzzy old line that defines (or not) who is the child and who is the parent. In the last four months as my mum lies permanently entangled in her half-life post-stroke, I spoon feed her, … Continue reading →

Posted in job, parenting, stroke | 3 Comments

In search of me….

Posted on January 24, 2011 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

I went to a party this weekend. In London. Not only have I not said those words since about 1986, but the decadence involved of dumping one’s children, getting on a plane and booking into a hotel – alone – … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 6 Comments

Small and Big

Posted on January 11, 2011 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

I’ve never felt so small in my life. Or so big. After years of believing I’m in control of my life I realise its fragility, and how, in an instant it can all be over. That’s what happended to my … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 6 Comments

Sliding doors of life….

Posted on December 28, 2010 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

Even before the film Sliding Doors appeared, I often lived parallel lives. As a child, at unhappy times, I would literally live another life in my head, while my real life carried on. (Often this other life involved lots of … Continue reading →

Posted in mothers, stroke | 4 Comments

Who’s the mummy?

Posted on December 16, 2010 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

Life used to be simple. Clear cut. Black and white. Roles were defined and refined. We all knew were we stood. My mum was my mum. I was her daughter. Then I became a mum and I had daughters. So … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 4 Comments

Lessons of life…

Posted on December 7, 2010 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

My mum has taught me many things. How to bake. How to sew. How to knit. How to make a mean gravy. How to stack a dishwasher…. the latter something I never quite grasped much to my mum’s annoyance. And … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 2 Comments

Letter to Ruby

Posted on November 18, 2010 by Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

In the midst of all the darkness, there is light – a bright shining light of life. So while I grieve for my mum, I must remember to celebrate my new daughter. Dear Ruby Rose, You are 8 weeks old … Continue reading →

Posted in Uncategorized | 6 Comments