Look away, children….

In future years, if my children ever fancy a glance at their childhood, or want an insight into the sometimes mad woman who brought them up, they might read back over these blogs. That’s partly why I started writing them – as a little outlet for my not-so-little frustrations, a global platfrom to celebrate their wonderfullness, but most of all, as a record of our journey together, mother and daughters. Over the last 6 years there have been too-many-to-count glorious gushings about how amazing, how thrilling, how funny, how utterly lovely my beautiful girls are (see how I’m front-loading the praise?)…… so please girls, excuse this little eeny weeny post that’s all about me…. look away now.

Yes… in approximately 20 hours time, I will be boarding an Aer Lingus jet (SANS ENFANTS), for a 5 hour (CHILD-FREE) flight to New York, for a five day break (FROM ROUTINE, CHORES, COOKING, CLEANING, WIPING BUMS, MAKING FOOD, WIPING FOOD UP FROM THE FLOOR, YADA YADA YADA….) with a great friend (NOT A CHILD, BUT A REAL ADULT FRIEND).

Phew! It feels amazing just to be writing it. I know I shouldn’t be feeling this desperate to get away, BUT I AM!!!!!!! I CANNOT WAIT!!!!!!! (I told you to look away, but one day you’ll understand!)

We’ve been saving for three years (yes count them….. three years). And it’s not even the cocktails I’m looking forward to (although I’m sure going to be having one around the 4.30pm mark when my day is usually descending into mayhem and everyone’s reaching levels of hysteria normally reserved for major natural disasters). That will be a sip of pure bliss. It’s not the 5 nights of undisturbed sleep I’ll be getting (although I’m sure going to love that first 6am roll over when I realise no-one needs me). It’s the flight. Yes, a 5 hour flight where I can get to end of the page, drink something with bubbles that is not water, and even watch a film that doesn’t involve a princess. I’m going to lounge about SoHo and drink cocktails during the day. I’m going to jog across Brooklyn Bridge in the early morning noise, I’m going to eat bagels and enjoy not bustling in a city of bustle.

We booked our flights in January so it’s hard to believe it’s here. I’ve just booked in on-line and printed off my tickets, I’ve stocked the freezer with food, cleaned the house and dusted off the clothes that don’t get much of a viewing – the ones intended for the real world. I’ll be in it. Sipping cocktails, and smiling. A lot.

Although I’ve no doubt at all girls, I’ll be thinking about you every day…

About Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

Bouncing into middle age armed with courage, ambition and a pair of tweezers (chin hairs for anyone over the age of 45 reading this) I am a writer with a mission: to redefine this midway point in my life when the last thing I want to do is hang up my high heels and become invisible. This is the end of the beginning, not the beginning of the end. A single mum to 3 fabulous girls, an author, and a fundraising consultant, both ends of my candle are on fire. As I enter this new stage of my life, I want to explore what it means for 'mid-aged' women today, who were promised they could have it all, ended up doing it all, and just do not identify with the traditional image of middle age.
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2 Responses to Look away, children….

  1. cath c says:

    have a wonderful kid-free journey! nyc, though cold, is beautiful this time of year. we used to take the train in to see the lights and decorations,, and go skating at rockefeller center when i was kid.

    and when you find yourself scoping the crowd for that missing kid of yours, or wanting to point at the windows to share with them and find yourself wondering why you didn't bring them, too – stop. they'll be waiting for you when you get back!


  2. Oh wow. Make sure you tell us all about it. I want details! And lots of photos!! Hope you're having an amazing time.


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