Party politics

It has begun. Party politics….. at six. Daisy’s forthcoming birthday party is turning into something akin to a CIA secret mission – we have subterfuge, secrecy, leaks, plots, diplomacy and coverups…. and that’s just the invitations. Last year it seemed so simple. She invited her friends, I made princess magic mirror invites, everyone dressed in varying shades of pink, and the place was awash with Princess themed decor, food and games. This year, she wants a Fairy Party. I thought 6 year olds were over fairies. I was wrong. Children have been discussing their outfits with me for weeks! I have designed the cake, thought up the themed games and decor and we made 16 glittering winged fairy invites.

And then the trouble began. As we made out our list, I realised there were a few key friends missing. I asked why so-and-so and what’s-her-name weren’t invited. “They’re too bossy,” came the reply. “But they’re you’re friends and they invited you to their parties,” I replied slightly preturbed how my own parent politics was going to deal with this as I met the mum’s at the gates. A stubborn refusal was my answer. I left it, carried on sticking feather hair onto the fairy invites (“purple please, so they look like Katy Perry”). We talked about it a few more times, but she was resolute in her decision – she only wanted ‘nice’ people at her party. In the end I have decided to let her play it out…. I’ve warned her of the consequences, given her an aliby (I’m only allowing her 10 guests), and am secretly a little proud she is standing firm not to invite the ‘popular, loud girls’ but just the ones she really likes. But this is were the Mission Impossible begins. Try giving out invites to some parents and not others as we wait for the school doors to open (there is a school policy of not letting kids give out invites in class, for this very reason I suspect.) I’ve been so stressed this week, trying to whisper “pssst, it’s an invite”, while smiling at the mum across the yard who’s daughter’s not invited. It’s taken 4 days to get them all delivered, and I’m worn out before I’ve even stuffed the goody bags. Three daughters, 18 years of parties ahead of me…. I’m off to buy some decent anti-wrinkle cream.

About Grin & Tonic by Alana Kirk

Bouncing into middle age armed with courage, ambition and a pair of tweezers (chin hairs for anyone over the age of 45 reading this) I am a writer with a mission: to redefine this midway point in my life when the last thing I want to do is hang up my high heels and become invisible. This is the end of the beginning, not the beginning of the end. A single mum to 3 fabulous girls, an author, and a fundraising consultant, both ends of my candle are on fire. As I enter this new stage of my life, I want to explore what it means for 'mid-aged' women today, who were promised they could have it all, ended up doing it all, and just do not identify with the traditional image of middle age.
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3 Responses to Party politics

  1. Oh you're absolutely awesome… and totally gorgeous! Look at that new header pic. My heart melted a little bit when I opened up this post to see that. BEAUITFUL pic of you ladies, ohhh you're all just lovely :o)
    How incredible are their little minds? Amazing really. They have it sussed from such a young age and I totally give them credit for it. Though it IS rather stressful on us Mama's, because reading about your situation this week, I can honestly say that would send my hair completely grey… rather than just the odd grey strand ;o) I really dislike being put in those awkward social situations at the best of times, let alone as a result of decisions made by my children! I fear I have it all ahead of me also… though boys surely can't be as selective as girls? surely???
    Can't wait to read all about the pretty fairy party, you must do a post about it, pleeeease :o) xo


  2. This reminds me of the time when my daughter had safely sent out her party invitations and all was well. But then she decided she was going to start uninviting people who she suddenly fell out with for five minutes, and invite new people that she didn't like last week! She's just had her last big party. For her 9th we'll have a much smaller one with four or five friends. So it does get easier but you have a few years to go yet!


  3. cath c says:

    ugh! boys are so much easier. come to think of it, at about the same age, my eldest went through similar, so scratch that. the good news is that it does end…or that it can. sounds like you handled it the best way possible.


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